The other night, I MC’d an event alongside the incredible girls from Circle In, Jodi and Kate.
It was a night discussing start out to start-up, and as you can imagine when anything is related to the discussion of #startupLYF, … it gets personal, and intimate, and transparent, and genuine, and all of the feel-good heartfelt stuff, … and without even meaning to? I found myself absolutely gushing about my husband.
Which is probably a little bit lame, really, … because we’ve been together for 17 years, and I kinda think the gushy-gush belongs to the brand new high school sweethearts, and not the 35 + 38yo, who’ve been together forever, and who prioritise sleep, and the getting-of-sleep above all else in their marriage, because #thankskids, ha!
I can’t remember how we got onto the topic of Dave, but I feel like it was something to do with the fact that we might have been asked something along the lines of, “how do you pull it all off?”, and we agreed that we all lean on people.
Jodi leans on her Mum.
Both Jodi and Kate lean on their partners.
And I? Most definitely lean on “Davey Boy”, or as our beloved TDP graduate community lovingly refer to him as, #poorDave.
#hashtagpoorDave has played the most beautiful, but super silent, and non-expectant of any kind of thanks for his beautiful-but-super-silent role in TDP’s success, and I can whole-heartedly say that TDP wouldn’t be where it is today without everything he’s done to support our business and its growth.
To begin with, he’s stretched his own salary to its absolute limit to support me in TDP’s early days where there was zilch income, and a full reliance on him to cover *basically* everything until our business was in a position to be able to pay ourselves [a long time, ha!]. He’s painstakingly printed and binded workbooks every Friday night [and sustained multiple paper cuts in the process, ha!]. He’s been a shoulder to lean on when I’ve wanted to give up. He’s celebrated every win with me, and reminded me to remember the feeling associated with that win when I’m in the aforementioned wanting-to-give-up state. And in 2016? He stepped up in the most profound way when I virtually workshop’d in a different state of Australia, every single weekend.
He rolled up his sleeves, turned his own full-time working week into an entire solo parenting weekend while I workshop’d interstate, regionally, and in Melbourne, … every.single.weekend. But the best part? I don’t recall a single guilt trip for any of this.
I mean, he wouldn’t have wanted to, … I was completely burnt out, and borderline psychotic, ha! But still, it needs to be said, … the offering of support without an associated guilt trip, is the very best kind of help to receive.
And that’s what I have received, and continue to receive, without fail.
I could go on, but I won’t, because I’m aware of how incredibly privileged I am to be in the position of having the kind of partner who isn’t just financially supportive of my small business endeavours, but practically supportive too, and [very much so] mentally supportive.
And that’s what we arrived at when we were discussing spousal and/or partner support at the Circle In start out to start-up night, i.e it takes a lot of support to pull off start-up life.
And not all of us will have it from our partners, i.e some of us are no longer partnered, or have never been partnered [and it’s for this reason, that I check my privilege regularly, because the spousal support I have – particularly financially – has played a huge role in TDP’s ability to even TDP in the first place.
We decided at the end of this conversation that actually, it takes a special kind of person to be the spouse / partner of a small business owner, and to call a spade a spade? Not everyone is cut out for it. And that’s ok. It doesn’t mean your spouse / partner is sh*t, … it just means they’re not cut out for the selflessness, resilience + grit that’s required of someone partnered to a person trying to grow a small business.
My Davey Boy? One in a million.
Legitimately one in a million, and everything I wish every small business owner had for themselves, i.e their very own ultimate cheerleader [albeit rugged, mostly unshaved, bushy eyebrow’d, and very non-steretypical cheerleader-like looking, ha!].